Families to Home | helping SCV single parents obtain housing

Several nonprofits, including Single Mothers Outreach (SMO), have partnered with Bridge to Home to give housing subsidies to selected families. Also participating are Family Promise and the Domestic Violence Shelter. 

Many parents are unable to rent housing due to poor credit scores, which are the criteria most landlords use to qualify renters. Many single parents have poor scores due to foreclosure or bankruptcy that resulted from job loss or divorce.

Single Mothers Outreach presently serves 25 families who are homeless and another 26 families who live with relatives. Often, the parents and children share the same room.

SMO will vet out families who need housing assistance. Families selected for the Families to Home program pay no more than 30% of take home pay for rent. In addition, SMO requires parents in the program to graduate from Financial Peace University and they will be subject to income reviews and budgetary oversight. SMO has partnered with Accurise to pull credit reports for SMO families and advocate for them when there are discrepancies. Accurise claims that more than 80% of credit reports contain errors. Credit agencies have 30 days to resolve disputes or they must remove the item from the credit report, resulting in a higher credit score.

The goal is to help single parent families become self-sustaining.

Families receive three months of subsidies and case management by the referring agency (in this case, SMO) through Families to Home. Bridge to Home will manage the program, including securing apartments for participating families. Funding will be made possible by generous grants from the City of Santa Clarita and the County of Los Angeles and we expect to launch the program in July. After three months, the referring agency will subsidize rent until the family becomes completely self-sufficient or is removed from the program. We expect to be able to serve 2-3 famlies through Families to Home…a step in the right direction…but well short of the need.

SMO single parent, Jenelle Hamilton, was deeply in debt after her divorce and was living in her parent’s home with her daughter. They shared a room and were sleeping on a bunkbed. Janelle could not sit up in bed without hitting her head. As she puts it, “I got sick and tired of being sick and tired” and enrolled in SMO’s Financial Peace University class. Within a few months, she was debt-free. She enrolled in college and is now well on her way towards independence. Jenelle is precisely the kind of parent this program is meant to serve and we look forward to serving many like her.

Financial Recovery for Women, Single Moms | COC Women’s Conference

I am excited to announce that Single Mothers Outreach parent Lori O’Brien will be a guest speaker at this Saturday’s Women’s Conference at College of the Canyons. Her topic: financial empowerment.

She writes, “I have lived in SCV for 15 yrs and I’ve been a single mom for 10 of those years. Every one of us has at one time or another been so worried and anxious about our financial situations that we’ve lost sleep, experienced physical symptoms such as digestive issues, random aches and pains, etc., that anxiety over financial matters creates, and it robs us of the joy of living and time with our children.”

Lori is a graduate of Single Mothers Outreach’s successful financial literacy program. Nationally syndicated radio/TV talk show host, Dave Ramsey teaches the program on DVD and small group discussion follows. If participants work the program, they will see positive financial results.  In taking the class in the Fall 2010, she has paid off $4000 in debt and has put $1000 in an emergency fund, which gives her some peace while she is paying off debt.

“With implementing some of the principles and methods I’ve learned, I’ve learned how to stand on my own two feet and provide for my family.” Lori remarked.

Lori will be sharing highlights of the program and taking sign ups for those interested in going through the program this Saturday, March 17, 2012 at the College of the Canyons Women’s Conference. Tickets are $15.00 and can be purchased here.

Golf with a Big Heart | 4th Annual Fools’ Paradise Golf Tournament and Wine Tasting

Did you know that almost 40% of our operating budget comes from our three annual events? We are working hard at planning our best-ever golf tournament and wine tasting event and we need your help. Do you…

…have gift cards you could donate?

…unwanted, unused wedding/birthday/Christmas gifts?

…a timeshare you aren’t going to use this year?

…unused credit card rewards points you could cash in?

…need a tax deduction?

If so, please contact DaAnne Smith at 661.200.0745 to discuss donating these items for our silent/live auction.

Thanks for helping us hold a successful event!

Why I’m Excited About Wartime Romance | A Once-in-a-Lifetime Event in Santa Clarita

DaAnne Smith is the Executive Director of Single Mothers Outreach in Santa Clarita, CA.

Wartime Romance is a true story. Writer Marilyn Hackett discovered letters her father had written her mother during the four years he served as a pilot in World War II. They were intensely personal and moving, and she decided to bring the story to life in a way she knows intimately. She’s worked in the performing arts her entire career. She observed there are very few plays devoted to the events of World War II, so she wrote a musical play. She envisions Wartime Romance being performed in high schools across the country.

It is a play written in an age of innocence. It is part of our nation’s history. It is nostalgic.

It shows in Santa Clarita for one day.

On April 28, at 7:00 at the COC Performing Arts Center, 850 Santa Clarita residents will experience a once-in-a-lifetime event before the play moves across the country.

This is an experience for veterans, active military personnel, children, pet lovers (yes, there is a dog in the act!), and adults who love World War II history.

During intermission, postcards will be handed out to the audience to write a note of thanks to our military servicemen and women, which will be mailed by local girl scouts troops.

It’s personal to me. My dear friend and mother-in-love turns 89 in April. This was her coming of age era. Dottie loved the fashions, the music, and the dancing of the forties. She also joined the USO; who can resist a hero in uniform? It was also an exciting time as women took an active working role during the war. In fact, Dottie worked into her seventies, a point of immense pride.

I’ve enjoyed listening to her tell stories of life during the forties: the time of uncertainty, of emotions magnified due to the urgency the nation felt as we shipped our brightest and best to an uncertain future far, far away. There were many who gave their lives to protect the freedoms you and I take for granted. Her fiancé was one of those who never returned.

So for her birthday, we are treating Dottie to Wartime Romance. We bought VIP tickets so we get to experience the whole thing, including dinner in the “Canteen”. It will be a nostalgic experience and it is precisely the kind of entertainment she loves. It’s the best gift and I can’t wait!

Tickets to Wartime Romance can be purchased at www.wartimeromance.com. Proceeds from the 7:00 p.m. performance benefit Bridge to Home and Single Mothers Outreach.

Single Parent Success Story | Single Mothers Outreach’s own Jennifer Kennedy

Jennifer hugs a mom at Make a Mother's Day

Below is my entry to the Undercover Boss contest, which was suggested to me by one of our parents. Many thanks to De Jenkins, who helped me craft the words. -DaAnne Smith

Jennifer Kennedy started working with Single Mothers Outreach (SMO) just in time. We had little money in the bank and I was at the end of my hope after several key volunteers and my only part-time employee gave notice during one of our busiest times of the year, the holidays. With only one paid employee—me—SMO was serving almost 500 families, and I was careening toward the depths of complete burnout.

Single Mothers Outreach empowers single parents and their children by providing hope, support, and resources so that families can become self-sustaining. This mission statement was crafted after twelve years of serving single parent families, when SMO was brought to its financial and organizational knees. As the then Board of Directors President, I scrambled and rallied with my fellow board members to procure and organize the resources needed to continue providing services. To do this, I first served dual roles as board president and acting executive director. I stepped down as board president and continued serving as executive director—without reimbursement—for well over a year.

As the organization stabilized financially, I continued as executive director at a salary well under the market norm, but I was energized and rewarded by the progress we were making and the lives we were impacting. SMO flourished. We reestablished our organization in the community, sharing vital information about our turnaround and the work we were doing. We reorganized programs to avoid duplicating services of other non-profit agencies, and we focused instead on the unique services we could provide. We recruited board members and other volunteers with the skills we needed to expand the depth and breadth of SMO’s services, and to propel the organization toward a successful future. That’s where Jennifer Kennedy enters the picture.

Jennifer had moved to Santa Clarita from New Jersey in 2008, a move made for her husband’s job. She quickly connected in our community, offering her extensive experience in non-profit and community services, fundraising, and event coordination. She immersed herself in her new surroundings as intern supervisor for membership services at the Santa Clarita Chamber of Commerce. Jennifer’s experience with national non-profit organizations (dating back to 1991) such as The Avon Foundation, Muscular Dystrophy Association, Catholic Charities, The Arc, The American Red Cross, and Interfaith Hospitality Network lent itself well to her pursuits in Santa Clarita. She volunteered for her church, her daughter’s schools, and local non-profit agencies such as Circle of Hope and the Michael Hoefflin Foundation.

But, when Jennifer came to work for SMO, she was, like our organization, also struggling. Her marriage had ended after sixteen years, and she was in the final stages of her divorce. I could only pay her a meager part-time wage; in fact, she left a much higher paying job to take this one. But, as she puts it, it was more important to her to do meaningful work than to be

paid a higher wage. I hired her to direct our programs and services, all aimed at helping single parents become self-sustaining. As Jennifer began her life as a single parent, she grabbed the hands of the parents she served at SMO, and they all learned and grew together.

To say that Jennifer breathed new life into our organization is a gross understatement. She quickly learned the ropes and jumped into helping our families in crisis, often seeing several families in a day. She built our case management program, which had suffered many setbacks, until it was running smoothly. Jennifer has an innate sense of how to care for and motivate people at the same time. When she meets with parents, she often challenges them, reminding them they are stronger than they realize—perhaps reminding herself at the same time. She points them in the direction of the resources they need to move forward, does what she can to assist our families as they progress, and celebrates their successes with them.

She listens attentively to discover unmet needs, often identifying programs and resources that our parents never knew existed. As a matter of fact, she soon discovered that many of our single parents were isolated, lonely, and had little or no interaction with other adults. She saw their need to mutually support one another—and for social interaction. As a result, she planned bi-monthly social events so our parents and their families could meet, form friendships, and network. Today, deep bonds have been forged among many of our families and parents, allowing them to achieve together what they could not have imagined on their own.

Jennifer is a living, breathing role model of perseverance and overcoming adversity. She was diagnosed with dyslexia as a child and struggled throughout her school life. She remembers school and medical staff telling her parents she would never learn in mainstream education, that she was too disabled by her dyslexia to learn. But this woman is a fighter who faced these battles in her childhood. She took advantage of support programs to help her complete her education. She graduated from college and earned not one, but two Bachelor of Arts degrees.

As I got to know Jennifer, I also found out about her work supporting women in the Dominican Republic. Through the Caring Chain, she travelled twice to the DR and continues to support this program. During her visits there, Jennifer taught women to crochet. These women, who normally attempt to support their families by selling small flour cakes on the side of the road, are taught a craft that allows them to create products for sale at their local markets. Jennifer and other Caring Chain volunteers coordinate yarn drives and have developed close friendships with the women they have met. And just as learning to crochet has made “magic” for women thousands of miles away, Jennifer has also shared this passion with SMO families by organizing a crocheting class. I was really surprised by the number of parents who attended, and the group continues to grow every time they meet. What is most important is that this is another way for parents to connect with each other and form friendships. Because of Jennifer’s influence, we are building a vital community at Single Mothers Outreach.

In the midst of getting to know Jennifer, I also found out she is also a seventeen-year breast cancer survivor. This isn’t a badge or label she wears; instead, it’s a part of the fabric that makes her the woman she is, strengthening her character and her resolve to support and help other women. This woman is a fighter!

Jennifer sees herself not as a SMO employee, but as a SMO partner. Knowing our tenuous financial situation, she worked very hard during the spring and summer of 2011 to launch a first-of-its-kind family-focused water festival event in our community that was very well received. We raised a few thousand dollars—and improved recognition and awareness of our organization and the work we do in our community. She has also utilized her considerable talents to build our volunteer corps, mostly from within our parent membership, multiplying the capacity of our agency.

What a difference a year has made. Jennifer just celebrated her one-year anniversary on February 7, 2011. I am energized and optimistic that my longtime dream of expanding Single Mothers Outreach nationally has real possibility because of Jennifer’s effective contributions. Her ability and effort allow me to focus my energies on moving SMO forward toward organizational self-sustainability, and Jennifer has found peace, strength, and independence as a single mom.

Jennifer and daughter Marissa

You may wonder why I would enter a national contest where there is a slim chance of winning. I enter for the chance to help a colleague who has not only become my right hand at work, but also a dear friend. Jennifer’s only daughter, Marissa, is ten and she wants to go to college. On the salary we are able to pay Jennifer, there is no way she could afford college without going into debt, which is something she will not do. I want Marissa to be able to go to college. And, I also want to help an organization that has come to mean so much to single parents who strive daily for their family’s well-being. I am compelled to do everything in my power to help.

Hope is the fuel that drives everything at Single Mothers Outreach.

Respect and Its Opposite: Gossip | Single Mothers Outreach Values

This article is part of a series of articles highlighting core values at Single Mothers Outreach.

We all want respect. After all, it is intricately tied to one of the most basic of human needs: the need to feel loved. Respect is the evidence of being esteemed by another. We all want it, but we often don’t give it to others. Most commonly we disrespect our fellow brothers and sisters by gossiping about them.

Gossip is defined as “Rumor or talk of a personal, sensational, or intimate nature.”

Gossip is almost always destructive. Its aim is to tear people down. The one who gossips feels a sense of superiority, and the information imparted is often not based in fact. Most of us have been victims of gossip, so we know the hurt and damage it can cause, yet many of us are easily drawn to participating, if not instigating it.

One of the best examples of the damaging effects of gossip is found in the movie Doubt:

Respect is a core value at Single Mothers Outreach. We have worked very hard to create a healing place for hurting single parents and we strive to maintain a non-judgmental and accepting environment for all our families.

Where two or more people gather, whether it is at work, a club, or church, conflicts and misunderstandings can and will occur. At SMO we strive to create a safe place where parents, staff and volunteers communicate hurts or frustrations when they occur. We believe gossip is a cancer that can quickly and easily poison our organization so we do not tolerate it among staff and volunteers.

We are not perfect. After all,we are an organization made up of imperfect human beings,  but we strive toward it. Respect matters a great deal to us.

DaAnne Smith is the Executive Director of Single Mothers Outreach in Santa Clarita, CA 

Contagious Generosity | Multiply the Gift Challenge

DaAnne Smith serves as executive director of Single Mothers Outreach (SMO) located in Santa Clarita, CA. Since 1995 SMO has focused on restoring dignity to single parents who struggle to provide for their families in the midst of major life changes.

Several weeks ago, I had lunch with a SMO Champion who shared she wanted to help one of our single moms with a $1,000 cash gift. Years ago she had been a single mom, was now remarried and a successful businesswoman, and she wanted to pay it forward.  As she handed me the check, she held on to it for a few moments, closed her eyes, paused and then exclaimed, “May this gift be multiplied 10 times!”

I have struggled with how to bring honor to this outrageously generous gift!

I knew the family I wanted to bless: a mom who has been in our program for several years. She has the sole responsibility for her two autistic boys. A few months ago, they tested one of her sons for a brain tumor (thankfully it came out negative.) She is a full time nursing student at UCLA and she is completely on her own; she has no help from the boys’ father or extended family. SMO is her family.

I wanted to make it possible for her and her boys to enjoy some fun, and of course that means Disneyland! I thought it would be great to give them two days with a night’s stay in the Disneyland Hotel and then give them some cash, but when I checked into the cost (my own children are long grown and gone) I was shocked at how expensive the park had become. I didn’t feel right spending the whole gift on a couple of days in an amusement park.

I also thought, how does this multiply the gift?

I was conflicted, so I called her. I told her someone wanted to bless her and told her about the Disneyland idea. I told her to think about it and call me the next day.

The next day she called and said that while she was extremely grateful for the offer to go to Disneyland, what she really needed was to get her car fixed.

That is so like a single mom…they always think about practical things…and who could blame them? So I had her contact a trusted mechanic, Chip Reeves at Chip’s Brake and Muffler and he fixed her car. The bill: $226. So now what?

I still want to take that family to Disneyland. She works so hard and they truly deserve it.

Then I read a little book called Contagious Generosity. Author Barry Cameron makes a bold claim that generosity is contagious. He also states that generosity is part of our human design, “God built the principle of contagious generosity into every single cell of the human body. Every centimeter of skin, every artery, every muscle, every blood vessel and every organ is designed to give and receive.” (Emphasis mine.)

He then went on to tell the story of Bob Thompson of the Thompson-McCully Company. When he sold the company, he shared the proceeds of the sale with the employees who’d helped made Thompson-McCully successful. He gave $128 million dollars to his 550 employees. Cameron writes:

“Instantly it was as if dozens of workers had won the lottery. There were lots of tears and hugs. Many were left speechless. Hourly workers, most of whom had pensions or 401k plans, received $2,000 for each year of service to the company; some checks exceeded annual salaries. Salaried workers who had no pensions, were given checks or annuity certificates they could cash in when they reached age 55 or 62. Those ranged from $1 million to $2 million each.

One worker’s wife wrote, “What do I say to you for changing our lives and handing us a future we have never dreamed of?”

He ends the story with a challenge: “I’m challenging you to start trying to live, love, give, and work as generously as you possibly can. Whether you own your own company or you’re an employee working for someone else, you’re not going to lose a thing because you’re generous. In fact, you’re going to discover genuine generosity has a boomerang effect and you’ll actually receive more than you give.”

Will you help me test the truth of this statement and help me multiply the gift?

Let’s not only send this family to Disneyland (and stay overnight at the Disneyland Hotel), let’s collectively give them a financial gift that unequivocally says, “You matter, you’re important, and we support you.” Are you in?

If so, please let me know how you can help (any Disney employees willing to donate a ticket or three?) You will not only bless this family in a big way, you will also honor the donor who made contagious generosity possible.

And may you be blessed tenfold…pass it on!

To Make a Season Bright | Single Mom to Receive a Big Surprise This Christmas

Single Mothers Outreach helps single parent families move forward.

It’s busy this time of the year. With over 200 families being served through our Adopt-a-Family program, we see a lot of people come and go at our office.

I love this week at SMO. After weeks of application handling, calling, filing, data entry and pairing adopters with families, this is the week we see the fruit of our labor. This week our adopters drop off their gifts. It is a wonderful experience and we often see miracles. Like today.

Jennifer Kennedy, our Programs and Services Director, came into my office to ask who we could call to see about obtaining two bikes for a six and eight year old.  Their father left the family last year, their house was foreclosed this year and their mom recently lost her job because she took time off to care for her extremely ill father (who passed away). Needless to say, it has been a very tough year for this family. Unfortunately, the family was on a waiting list (as of this writing, there were twelve families who had not been adopted. If you would like to adopt one of our families please call Jennifer at 661.200.0742.) SMO was able to pull together some toys for the children and a gift card for mom. When we called to tell her we had some gifts for her, she cried. Jennifer wanted to do more by finding bikes for the children because they were on their wish list.

Enter Trish Grinnell, President of the Rotary Club of Santa Clarita. The Rotary had adopted a family with ten children and she and a fellow Rotarian stopped by to drop off their gifts. After depositing them in our office, she casually remarked that they also had a couple of bikes to give to a family who would like them. Jennifer, barely able to contain her excitement asked, “for what age children?”, to which Trish replied, “there’s one for a six year old and one for an eight year old.”

We all rejoiced – every one of us in the office rejoiced.

What Trish and her colleague didn’t know, is that several of the parents helping in our office today are unemployed. One parent was fired from her job last week and is struggling emotionally. Her case manager prescribed that she help in the office this week – she needs to be with people, with our community. And she needs to see kindness because she has not seen that in a while. When you are unemployed, you need to see miracles and you need to see kindness. It restores hope. Every one of those parents’ spirits were lifted today.

Today we tasted from the cup of kindness and it tasted wonderful.

Jennifer decided not to tell our mom about the bikes: she wants to surprise her. This grieving mother needs to experience a miracle too. We can’t wait!

Holiday Musings | Single Parents and the Holidays

Single Mothers Outreach empowers single parents and their children by providing hope, support, and resources so that families can become self-sustaining.

I had a conversation with one of our regular volunteers (and a SMO Champion) who remarked that until she began working with our families, she had no idea how many Santa Clarita residents were struggling. “I thought there weren’t any poor living here – I thought this was a rich community.”

We get that a lot.

We presently have over 300 active families in our program and almost two-thirds have requested help for the holidays because there just isn’t enough for the basics, let alone gifts. Many are embarrassed to ask for help. One of our parents wrote: “This will be the third time we’ve been a part of the Adopt-a-Family program over the past 10 years and it doesn’t get any easier for me being on the receiving end. I say that, because it is very definitely difficult to swallow my pride and accept the goodness and generosity of my community.” But what a loving parent won’t do to bring a little joy and good cheer into her children’s lives. They swallow pride and mail the application.

Now for the GOOD News.

Every one of our families will be adopted this year, even the ones who didn’t qualify and were put on a wait list. At this moment (we usually help families up to the last day) that means 660 parents and children will have gifts under the tree this year. Many will receive at least two gifts, so you can imagine the sheer volume!

So we are throwing a party.

On December 17 from 9-12 at the Santa Clarita United Methodist Church, carolers will sing (courtesy of Valencia United Methodist Church), Santa will delight, and plenty of  elves (thanks to Valencia Hills Community Church) will help us distribute a ton of gifts. We’ve invited our adopters and our parents are baking cookies to share to thank them.

We all win. We all partake from the cup overflowing with joy and the knowledge that this is humanity at its best.

This is what the season is all about.

*Parents qualify by being in school, attending SMO sponsored workshops, volunteering 6 hours in the previous 6 months. They are given first priority. Despite knowing they didn’t qualify, we received over 50 additional applications, underscoring their need/desire to be adopted.

Isolation | Single Parent Social Challenges in the “SCV”

DaAnne Smith is the Executive Director of Single Mothers Outreach of Santa Clarita.

In an earlier column I touched on a common issue with single parents: isolation. Santa Clarita is a suburb of Los Angeles County where we proudly boast of good schools, plentiful parks and churches, and thriving organizations such as the Boy Scouts and Girl Scouts, AYSO and Hart Baseball. No doubt about it: Santa Clarita is a desirable place to live and raise a family.

But what happens when that family breaks apart due to death, divorce or separation?

Single parents often feel misplaced. Hanging out with their married friends is often a painful reminder of what has been lost, and they no longer relate to the single life. At church, single parents are often subtly reminded that they are not a whole family. Many sermons and social activities center around the two-parent family. At worst, the effect is that a single parent feels judged, and at best h/she doesn’t quite fit.

There are two basic human needs:  to feel loved and to feel a sense of belonging.

Single Mothers Outreach helps single parents connect with each other to form friendships, which are vital to parents’ emotional health.  Our friends at New Life Assembly of God serve a free monthly breakfast, coinciding with Shop the Closet, our free clothing distribution event. In August we had about forty families come out for breakfast. There is something about “breaking bread” or eating together, that helps break down social barriers and helps our families get to know one another. They form friendships.

And they support one another.

One day recently I overheard a parent call another parent to arrange a carpool so she could go to a doctor’s appointment. We recently asked one of our parents who owns cleaning service to clean our office; she couldn’t do it, so she called another SMO parent who also cleans houses to come to our aid. They would have never met had it not been for Single Mothers Outreach.

The importance of providing opportunities to form friendships is not lost on Single Mothers Outreach and is the reason we are increasing social activities. Starting this fall we plan to host two social activities per month.

On Sunday, September 17, New Life hosted a Bar-B-Que at West Creek Community Park. About 75 parents and children attended. They provided a bounce-house and fun

SMO families enjoy a luau provided by New Life Assembly of God church members.

activities for the children (the squirt guns were a huge hit) while mom sat around and blissfully chatted with the other moms present. They served our families a luau dinner and New Life’s women’s ministries provided beautiful gift bags and raffle prizes. Every one of our parents received something. The joy was palpable. Barriers were broken and community occurred. Several moms and dads were talking about going to the next SMO activity: a ballroom dance event on September 30th hosted by Valencia United Methodist Church.

Priceless.